As I sit down to watch the second Hobbit movie, full of pizza and a beer (only three I promised myself, but it is a long movie!), I am thinking again of the things I would say to H in an email. It is a hobby I took up since K has asked that I let her know if we talk, so I just play what I would say instead of just getting it done with.

I always loved Bjorn. The idea of a man bear that might help or hurt, stuffing his guests with bread and honey. Thick buttermilk and cream. Actually, the bear was my favorite animal as a kid, and just became it again.

The one in the movie looks like shit. He is way un-bear. He looks more like he should turn into an owl. And in a movie that stretches and stretches, he plays a 2 minute role as a person in a place where the party was so pooped it didn’t want to leave. It plays fine in the movie, but it could have played better if they did it like the book. That was the time to show Bilbo’s change, not at the foot of Mirkwood. Its unbelievable.

Mirkwood looks cool. I guess middle earth used miles instead of kilometers. Shows how outdated and magical they are. Mirkwood is like Cambodia. No matter what, STAY ON THE PATH.

The scene where they get lost is gay. They walk around for two minutes, suddenly they are off the path, and then they are fighting. Bilbo poking his head through the trees is like I always imagined, but with less green. But that could be because of the quality of the copy I’m watching.

Link broke. To be continued in 8 hours 17 minutes according to my torrent client.

Link back up.  Good movie in spite of the overaction and the no battle of wits or any wits anywhere ever.  Guess we don’t want smart kids any more.  Six Saranacs in the end.  Can’t wait for the finale.

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